Johnston News

1.) Avi not only still likes to play in toilet water, but she can also now successfully lift the toilet seat (to my dismay).

2.) Baby #2 is kicking and rocking inside. I have actually forgotten how far along I am exactly, but I have been feeling movement since week 16, the earliest possible.

3.) Avi is getting better at walking and she can also officially climb down the stairs as well as go up them. Yeppie! Oh, the wonderful mobile world!

4.) Josh seems to be constantly moving and going, traveling often for work to the Chesapeake Bay, or sometimes he is a little luckier, such as going to FL last week. All to say, I am rightly jealous that he gets to see, go out on and at least have the opportunity to enjoy salt-water. Its rather not fair, as I am the one who loves the ocean, though his pictures and google-earth GPS locator I at least am in touch with the water through some form of media/technology.

5.) Late next week I have my mid-pregnancy ultrasound. As many know, this is THE ultrasound, the one everyone always waits and pines for. We can officially find out the baby’s sex. Last time we thoroughly enjoyed not knowing the baby’s sex and frustrating you all to no extent, making you guess and be annoyed. Besides it was a ton of fun hearing “its a girl” when Avi came out. Honestly, I am afraid that if we find out what the baby’s sex is, then it won’t be thrilling or exciting at all when the baby actually is born. My friends tell me this is silly, but I really don’t see how it can be thrilling when you know what your having. Of course, maybe that’s even more of a reason for me to find out what we are having, so then I can be proven wrong. All to say, Josh is letting me decided if I want to know or not in advance. As typical for a decision of this ‘caliber’, I cannot decide and I often find myself going over the pro’s and con’s. Currently I am leaning towards finding out the baby’s sex. This is probably because I have been somewhat rather wanting a boy; its an expectation I do not want to carry with me into the delivery room. Besides, if it is a boy, then I can plan for it. Is it possible that is its a girl I can keep it a secret and if its a boy I can know now? That would be ideal! But I guess that just doesn’t work since its pretty much a 50/50 thing. Hum. Any comments?

6.) My news of today is that my Dr. called confirming that I have mono, you know the “kissing disease” (or whatever we called it in high school). Isn’t that delightful? I got it from our housemate who we think is just getting over it (don’t worry, we weren’t kissing- at least not like that *wink*). So, this explains why I wake up every morning with a sore throat, still need almost 12 hours of sleep a day in my 2nd trimester, why I have swollen lymph nodes and why I still can’t knock off sickness in general (which I’ve pretty much had some form of sickness since the last week of September). So I am actually not really surprised (or even disturbed) by the news. In fact, if anything I am happy that I have finally been diagnosed with something. This is because a lot of my life I haven’t been diagnosed for something when something has often seemed “wrong,” so this time I am glad to know I am not a hypochondriac and at least there is some distinction (so therefore I am allowed to not feel well and don’t have to pretend that nothing is wrong). If I understand correctly, mono doesn’t have a particular treatment and it doesn’t effect the baby in me (and Avi shouldn’t be able to catch it), so I’m guessing it won’t be a life-altering problem until it fades down. I just hope for Josh’s sake I haven’t given it to him.

7.) Lastly, news wise, I came to the conclusion that I am overall

  • Content
  • Doing a lot
  • But still “being” as my identity

In other words, this is where I often have hoped to find myself for many years. I think I am maybe getting better at not having to define my self-worth with what I do. I’ve been realizing this as I had a profound revelation that I “do” a ton, a massive amount actually. I am involved in a ton of stuff which surprised me to acknowledge that. But the distinction is that I am not aware of it. It isn’t a stressor, it isn’t what I live for. Its more so I am living life, and I’m pretty content living life, doing what I do or not doing those things. For those of you not like me, this might make no sense why this is an amazing thing. Yet for some of you, you know exactly what I mean. Anyways, I hope I can continue down the road of contentment with life the way life is and where I am in it.


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